It’s been a year 

It’s been a year, love. It’s been quite a year.

This winter was hard and long and we wondered what would be next. The miles on the road flew by out the car window and the days and pain of my pregnancy passed slowly on the calendar while we cried and talked and worked to heal some broken pieces.

Spring broke fresh and clean with new disappointments and we said goodbye to some old dreams and goals.  Elijah Graham arrived and now we are a 3-family.  And then the lay off, and again we wondered what would be next.

Summer burned hot and we made plans to pack up our life and move our dreams abroad. Then Germany and Holland fell apart and we worked hard to keep from falling apart ourselves. And again we wondered what would be next.

Autumn fell and a new season started for both of us, and we started dreaming a bit again. We started new jobs, we keep on with our therapy and work and growth, and we keep on chasing Jesus.  And still, we wonder what is next.

We don’t know. But here’s what I do know.

I love you.  I love how you fit me so well. How you’re strong in ways that I’m not. How you challenge me, how you encourage me, how you seek to understand me, how you love me.

I love watching you be a father. I look at Eggs, at our silly Elijah Graham, and see you and me and wonder how he’ll grow and really, it’s all a wonder.  You are a great dad.

I still choose you.  I still choose us.  In small ways, in big ways, in sometimes not quite enough or the right ways, I choose us.

It’ll be another year, and another, and by the everyday unfailing grace of God who loves us most and chooses us best, it’ll be lots more years of you and me.

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